Friday, December 20, 2013

A Woman in her Thirties Drops the Ball

To know me is to know I am not a sentimental person, particularly when it comes to stuff. I don't get attached to things, not even when it comes to my kids.  Toys, clothes, books, you name it-- I have no desire to keep huge boxes full of old things to reminisce with someday (that's what this blog is for!).  Stuff is just... stuff.  And less is more, at least to me.

There are exceptions, of course.  My wedding dress.  Anna's Burberry swim suit:

Aaron's premie outfit he came from home from the hospital in:

But for the most part, I don't get attached.  So on Wednesday, when we came home from Anna's Christmas show:

(Can you spot my sweet girl singing Jingle Bells?)

And I took out the ornament with her handprint on it that she had made in class for 'Daddy and Me', I had to take a moment to think to myself, Gee, I really should be careful with this.  So we can save it.  Because that's what other moms...


Normally, I would be able to keep a level head about this.  It's an ornament.  No big deal.  But something about this moment, combined with a ridiculous about of sleep I've gotten lately, combined with Christmas chaos and state of my hair, and I just could not keep it together, people.  I just couldn't do it.

And you know what Anna said, when she saw it and saw me bawling my eyes out?

'It's okay, Momma.  It happens.  I make you another one.'

And thus, at the height of the Christmas season, a woman in her thirties is reminded that she's been right all along.  Stuff really is just stuff.   Tis the season to keep perspective.  

Monday, December 16, 2013

A Woman in her Thirties in a Constant State of...

Two weeks, no post.  I know, you're beside yourself with anxiety waiting to see what I've been up to.  Well, here are a couple things:

The Book

You know that moment, the one right before you're about to do something really scary, and the barf just sort of sits in your gut and swirls around, and your hands sweat and you get really dizzy and you wish a hole would just open up in the ground so you could fall right into it and disappear forever?

Yeah... it's like that all the time right now.  A constant state of barf.  Good barf, but barf just the same.

The Kids

You know those moments, when your kids are going through any type of transition, or they get sick, or they get a bonk, or they just don't feel like being your sweet little angels, and you feel like if you don't get to yoga immediately that you might spontaneously combust?

It's like that all the time right now.  Chaos.  Good chaos, but chaos just the same.

And I'm doing that thing where I look at other women in their thirties, ones with more on their plate than I have, and think HOW DO THEY HAVE IT SO MUCH MORE TOGETHER THAN I DO?  Which is a yucky, yucky question to have at the forefront of your mind at any time.

So on top of the book, and on top of the kids, and on top of all the crazy holiday craziness, I'm also trying to do that thing, that thing where I stop and stand in the moment, appreciate it for all it is...

...and give thanks.